tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16770020316698792502024-03-20T06:17:46.315-04:00My ContemplationsMy random observations and life's rantsGirl Making it Throughhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11199818933631448895noreply@blogger.comBlogger32125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1677002031669879250.post-10040296513130222892009-01-14T01:20:00.003-05:002009-01-14T01:33:28.835-05:00Life as I know itI have completely neglected my blogging and to be honest I have missed it. I <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">definitely</span> view this as a great way to ramble on about the goings on in my life.<br /><br />It's 2009 and I can barely believe it. I'm hoping it's a good year, I'm planning to move out on my own :D, I'm celebrating a one year anniversary with the boyfriend, I'm turning 20 (<span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">eeek</span>), <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2">I'm</span> learning how to play the guitar and I'm working hard. Every year I toast and hope for a year better than the last, but when I think about it every year may have its faults but they also have some <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_3">unbelievable</span> moments as well.<br /><br />Taking a glance back at 2008 a lot went down. I met the boyfriend, my sister had twins, I successfully completed my first year in <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_4">university</span>, I quit my crap job in retail and now work on campus for much better pay, I had amazing times with close friends, and learned even more about myself. OF COURSE it wasn't all sunshine and rainbows. My dad was diagnosed with <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_5">Korsakoffs</span> and is now living in a nursing home for the rest of his life, my one sister became way to dependent upon my mother and myself causing tons of stress to our lives, I went through a couple bouts of depression and almost died from <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_6">anaphylactic</span> shock when my nurse gave me ten times the amount of serum in my allergy shot.<br /><br />Over all I think I'm doing well. I'm proud of what I have accomplished so far and am looking forward to accomplishing all my goals. I no longer question who I am, because I know that I am a good person with a good heart and I don't need to be reassured by others to believe it. Life is a gift and I don't intend on wasting it.<br /><br />Here's to a great year!Girl Making it Throughhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11199818933631448895noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1677002031669879250.post-62991512010312127072008-12-03T15:01:00.002-05:002008-12-03T15:17:43.709-05:002 blogs, 1 day..Ya I'm feeling a bit ambitious today, but I am also making up for my horrible lacking of the posting.<br /><br />Oh my goodness it is December and <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">Christmas</span> is approaching WAY too fast, don't get me wrong I love holiday cheer and all that jazz but this season is rather stressful. As a student my budget is pretty tight but my list for people to buy for is lengthy. And I love to buy that gift for someone that they will just love, but this seems to get increasingly difficult every year. My mom has gone to her classic "I don't want anything for <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">Christmas</span>, just a happy family" line. But I can't criticize her for it because that would be hypocritical.<br /><br />This year I have not asked for anything, there just does not seem to be anything that I am in need of. I know this is frustrating for those who want to buy for me but I honestly cannot come up with anything that I want. Christmas has become such a <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2">commercialized</span> holiday and that is sad. Just being with family, listening to the cheerful songs, and enjoying the general splendor and feeling that <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_3">Christmas</span> brings is enough for me. It is so much more than gifts and shopping, it is time to sit back and appreciate the life you have been given.<br /><br />On <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_4">Monday</span> I went out and bought a cheap cardboard advent calendar with all the <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_5">Disney</span> princesses on it and I do quite enjoy it. Although everyone says I do the advent calender wrong. Most people eat a chocolate from box #1 on the first and box #2 on the second and so on, but I go the opposite way. I start at box 24 and count down so that I know how many days there are to <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_6">Christmas</span>, it just makes more sense to me that way.<br /><br /><span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_7">Any who</span> <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_8">Tis</span>' the season to be jolly and that's exactly what I'm planning on doing!! Good luck to all those <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_9">Christmas</span> shopping and decorating! <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_10">xo</span>Girl Making it Throughhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11199818933631448895noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1677002031669879250.post-59671590565114346322008-12-03T14:38:00.003-05:002008-12-03T14:46:14.696-05:00No Worry = LongevitySo I was reading the paper the other day and I came across an article about an 115 year old woman. In the interview she discussed how her husband had died in 1939 (<span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">omg</span>) and that she had outlived two of her sons. When asked what her secret was to such a long life she simply replied "I never worried about anything". At first I considered this absolutely impossible but the more I think about it the more it makes sense. Worry does not do anything, except make you sick.<br /><br />From now on I am for sure making a <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">conscious</span> effort to avoid worrying because I want the longest life that I may be granted and I want to make the best of it. And all this reminds me of the saying "Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference".<br /><br />Life is such a blessing and I do not believe it should be squandered. Make the best of every situation and be happy with who you are. I have finally reached a good place within myself and I wish everyone could see the good in life and in themselves. I love life, loving, and me and I will continue to grow and become the absolute best I can be.Girl Making it Throughhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11199818933631448895noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1677002031669879250.post-72566458465232640512008-11-26T22:13:00.002-05:002008-11-26T22:30:38.279-05:00Missed ConnectionsI realize I have been slacking hugely on the blogging. And I really didn't understand why. For a while I just had no words that seemed worth sharing. I started blogging as something constructive for myself. A personal therapy if you will. And it did help me. But then I got to a point where I realized life is just too short for complaining. I have taken way too many things for granted and I vow to end that here and now.<br /><br />Life is never happily ever after. Sure happy lives are lived but they are never perfect, everyone has their own set of issues (no matter how big or small). I have been going around self-conciously pitying myself. I would look at everyone else life around me and wish I had their joy. But being envious is not going to get me anywhere. Sure I will always admire those people who are brimming with self-confidence and who seemingly have the world at their finger tips, but I do not wish to be them. I am me and that is all I can be. I have my problems and my life is far from perfect but things could be much worse.<br /><br />I am thankful for so many things that outweigh all the negative in my life. Things like:<br /> - the best mother in the entire world for me<br /> - amazing friends that never pretend to know my pain, but instead comfort me and help me through the tough times<br />- my health, I am able to walk and talk and not have to worry about how much time I have left<br />- my family. Although they are quite crazy they make life interesting and far from boring<br />- an education. I have goals in life and one day I will <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">fulfill</span> them because I have been given the opportunity to go to university<br />- my experiences in life. I am stronger and wiser and will be able to face many more of life's problems because of my past<br />- me. I am thankful that I am me. I am a good person, and I don't need <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2">confirmation</span> from anyone else. I am kind, <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_3">compassionate</span>, loving, giving, and strong. I do not <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_4">regret</span> who I have become because I am the absolute best that I can be<br /><br />Life is never fair.<br /><br />My mom has told me that from the start. Things in life aren't easy and things are rarely handed to you. Be thankful for what you have and stop focusing on what you want. Being comfortable in your own skin is more important than getting that "hot" guy to notice you, or wishing you were that "beautiful" girl. Life is a gift and every positive thing in it is a blessing. Difficult times make us stronger and give us the gift of being able to realize how lucky we really are.<br /><br />Nothing should be taken for granted, life is too short for "what <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_5">ifs</span>".Girl Making it Throughhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11199818933631448895noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1677002031669879250.post-66050409049495444512008-11-05T21:26:00.003-05:002008-11-05T23:41:33.480-05:00I'm still alive!I know I haven't posted in a while but I've been pretty busy. I had a few midterms and I survived them. I've also been making a conscious effort to do things for myself. I had made an appointment with a counsellor to help me through my tough times, which was a big step for me. Although it is a kind of unique counsellor, it's a free service offered through my mom's work and the person will be call me for the session, which will take place over the phone. I don't know how I feel about this but we shall see how that goes.<br /><br />I have also contacted the secretary to the dean of students at school so that my professors may be notified that I am going through some tough personal issues and that my focus may be skewed for a while.<br /><br />Lastly I am getting a tattoo. Many people have different reasons for getting tattoos and a lot of people are against them. But to each their own. I have always been intrigued with the idea of getting a tattoo but I didn't want to get some random thing that I thought was cute or pretty, I wanted to get something that meant a lot to me and that I wouldn't ever regret. Since my goal is to become a teacher I know that I have to appear professional.... so after great thought I have decided to get the tattoo on my upper back because it can be hidden quite easily.<br /><br />My tattoo will incorporate 3 cherry blossoms, my Aries symbol, and the words Live, Laugh, Love.Each of those things are significant to me. First of all the number 3 is significant all on its own. It represents soo many things varying from culture to culture. But for me, I like the idea of past present and future. The past has helped shaped me into who I am today, and I have no regrets, I am who I am because of it, and my future is mysterious and unknown, but I am looking forward to it.<br /><br />Next the cherry blossoms. I did a lot of research about this and found several different interpretations of the meanings. The one that resonated the most with me was the Japanese version of it where it talks of the brevity of life, and how precious it is. It's important to know that when you are going through tough times they will eventually end and you will be stronger because of it. I have always been interested in zodiac signs and such, and my Aries symbol has meant a lot to me throughout the years, so it was a no brainer to involve that in my tattoo.<br /><br />And finally Live, Laugh, Love. I chose to add this in at the last minute. My mom has always loved this phrase and we have a few trinkets in our home the say it. But it truly is important. These are the things that are important in life, and to me. I want to live each day to the fullest, laughing will always be my best medicine, and there is no other feeling like loving and being loved.<br /><br />For all these reasons and more this tattoo will be important to me. I am doing this for me. I am not doing it because other people have them or it is "cool". This represents a lot to me and to have it with me forever will just remind me of what I need to focus on.<br /><br />I think I'm coming out of my dark stage, I'm thinking positive and I'm looking to heal myself.Girl Making it Throughhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11199818933631448895noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1677002031669879250.post-39625618976062330462008-10-27T12:54:00.002-04:002008-10-27T13:06:50.962-04:00What's important?<span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">I'm</span> so conflicted right now, my personal family issues are taking over my mind. I cannot concentrate on <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">school</span> and I am torn between what I am expected to do. I had 3 midterms last week, and I didn't do anywhere near enough studying as I should have and I am worried that my marks are going to reflect that. I've already got one mark back and it was a 50!! I've never got that low of mark, EVER!<br /><br />But do these mark REALLY matter? I mean does this mark actually dictate how intelligent I am, and does this class test my skills that I will need once I begin my career? No i <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2">don't</span> think so.<br /><br />So why am I so upset about this mark? Because I have been socialized to believe that marks reflect your intelligence and dictate how far you will go. I know I am an intelligent person, and I want to believe that I can <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_3">achieve</span> all my goals, but school has that possibility of holding me back, and I am terrified because I know I need school to do anything.<br /><br />UGH yet when I am faced with all these family problems, I am able to see how much more important human suffering is over stupid marks and tests. I honestly wish the only thing I had to worry about was school, and then perhaps I could prove that I am smart. But alas with all the family problems I am unable to focus and <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_4">I'm</span> hurting all the time.....<br /><br />I just <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_5">don't</span> know what I am supposed to do anymore....Girl Making it Throughhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11199818933631448895noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1677002031669879250.post-18998316791730907482008-10-22T23:24:00.002-04:002008-10-22T23:31:13.224-04:00PDA - NOT OKI am <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">definitely</span> against <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">PDA</span>. I don't mind couples holding hands or the random smooch. But please no making out and/or fondling in public. Seriously we get you are together now get away from me and get a room.<br /><br />Honestly there is no need for it. If you can't keep your hands off each other find somewhere to do it where you won't be disturbing those around you. Because HELLO no one wants to see that! We get that you are a couple , congrats, now move on and let me continue with my day.<br /><br />Any small show of affection is cute, endearing even. But over the top is completely <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2">unnecessary</span>. What you do together is private and should stay that way, your relationship doesn't need to be flaunted around everyone else so you can tell them " He/she is <em>mine</em>".<br /><br />Just because I'm passing you on the sidewalk or hallway does not mean I want your man, so rather than getting all up on him, try smiling and being pleasant, with any touching at a minimum.<br /><br />K <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_3">thx</span>!Girl Making it Throughhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11199818933631448895noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1677002031669879250.post-46677443625404104392008-10-20T23:13:00.002-04:002008-10-20T23:32:57.850-04:00Tears from stoneWell today was the big day. My Dad was moved to the nursing home. But not without a fight. This morning when the nurses informed him (again) that he was going to a nursing home he was enraged and refused to go. I was contacted and began to panic because if he didn't go he would loose the bed and I didn't know what would happen. After about an hour of the nurses/doctors/social worker talking to my father they finally got it through to him that there was no other choice and that he MUST go.<br /><br />So he went, against his will.<br /><br />I arrived to the nursing home about ten minutes after he had arrived. I brought him more clothing and such. I went to his room to see how he was doing and he was just sitting there, still in the hospital clothes and <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">unshowered</span>. His face was red and he was tapping his foot rather vigorously (clear indication of his anger). I say hi to him and talk about how nice it is there and how great the people are but he makes no response. I start to unpack a few of his things while continuing to talk to him, and he still remains silent. I finally turn to him and ask him if he is going to talk to me at all....he shakes his head.<br /><br />At this point I don't know what to do, I tell him that this is the best place for him that he will feel much more at home here than at the hospital and that he can make friends. And then a few solitary tears run down his face and he tries to hide them.<br /><br />I have NEVER seen my father cry. I didn't know what to do. There I was facing the man that used to be big and strong and whom I believed could face anything in the world and conquer....and he was crying, helplessly.<br /><br />I couldn't hold it in, I couldn't hold myself together....I tried to hide my tears but it was impossible. I had to leave because staying there wasn't helping either of us. I went to the front desk and the nurse started talking to me saying how sad it was and how young he was, and I broke down again <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">in front</span> of the nurses and patients, but I didn't care. The man who used to think I was his entire world now basically hated me and was crying because I put him here.<br /><br />When I start crying it's hard to stop so I had to pull myself together as best I could and just get out of there. Half-way across the parking lot I had a mental breakdown. The image of that helpless man sitting there silently crying was burned into my mind and it was breaking me. I got in my car and went home, sobbing the whole way.<br /><br />Usually if <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2">I'm</span> upset in public I can hide it relatively alright, but not today. With my face streaked with tears and my makeup melted everywhere. I avoiding eye contact with the many people who saw me. I got home and called my mom. I could barely speak. I was at the point where I sound like <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_3">I'm</span> five and <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_4">I'm</span> struggling for air. My mom came home on her lunch break to comfort me. But nothing seems to cheer me up. <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_5">I'm</span> 19 and my 50 year old father is in a nursing home, where he will live for the rest of his life. AND he resents me.<br /><br />When does the pain stop? Why did this have to happen to him? And why can't I get over it?<br /><br />I'm sick of crying and hurting and wishing for better days. I want happiness, that's all I want. But it seems always just out of reach. One day things have to turn around, life is not meant to be all bad.<br /><br />After all tough times don't last, and tough people do.Girl Making it Throughhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11199818933631448895noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1677002031669879250.post-44292854419165389852008-10-19T15:32:00.003-04:002008-10-19T15:41:26.828-04:00Father right?So as some of you may know from my previous posts my father is in the hospital. He has alcoholic <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">dementia</span>. Anyways he's been in the hospital for about 3 months now and on <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">Friday</span> we got the good news that he would be moved to a nursing home on <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2">Monday</span>, as he is unable to care for himself.<br /><br />So today I went to the hospital to visit with him and to bring him some clothes to wear for his journey over to the home, and the social worker told me it would do well to be honest with him. So I told him that he was finally getting out of the hospital (he seemed excited at this), and that he was going to live in a nursing home (significantly less excited now). At this he accused me of going behind his back and making arrangements without his consent.<br /><br />So I tried to change the subjects because he tends to argue a lot but in a short while will forget what the argument was about. Not today. He continued pressing asking who was in on this and that he was never going there. I ignored this hostility and rather asked him if there was anything he'd like me to bring in for him (candy,books, deodorant, movies etc.) and he responded with "I don't want a thing, just a family that cares for me, and it's clear I don't have one of those". OUCH!!<br /><br />I knew he wouldn't be thrilled about going to a nursing home because he has always been a proud man, but I didn't think it would make him want to disown me. So now I've been led to thinking I'm a) a bad daughter b)inconsiderate and selfish of his feelings and c) unwanted. But I suppose this is where I am supposed to remind myself that he is a sick man, and that he doesn't really mean the hurtful things he says......or does he??<br /><br />UGH another day of hurt feelings by that sick man who gave me lifeGirl Making it Throughhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11199818933631448895noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1677002031669879250.post-35519471386315215062008-10-17T17:55:00.002-04:002008-10-17T17:59:19.670-04:00Contagious...Good moods are contagious! <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">Soo</span> be happy and cheer every one up around you! I am in a <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">particularly</span> silly mood and although I am alone right now I feel pretty fan-freaking-<span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2">tastic</span>!<br /><br />So try it out! Smile laugh and pass it on! :D<br /><br />~Keep smiling, it makes people wonder what you're up to!Girl Making it Throughhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11199818933631448895noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1677002031669879250.post-27892592042975116692008-10-17T13:54:00.005-04:002008-10-17T14:14:17.866-04:00Emabarassing Videos...singing/cryingI love to sing, I personally think <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">Im</span> pretty amazing, but I believe a lot of people think that they are. And a lot of people are just plain tone deaf and they can sometimes be rather painful to listen to. But with the music loud enough pretty much anyone can sound just like the artist (as long as you're no <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">competing</span> to try and be louder!)<br /><br />At my sister's first wedding I was eight and as my present to her I sang a song. I sang <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2">in front</span> of 200+ guests and made a small mistake but I loved it! I sang I'll be your candle on the water (you know that song in Pete's Dragon). Ya and if I do say so myself I was pretty darn cute. But watching that video kind of <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_3">embarrasses</span> me because I know the mistake I made but no one else notices right away. But ya my point is I could make a could singer, most likely country <span style="color:#000000;">because </span>my voice sounds best singing along with country songs <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_6">lol</span>!<br /><br />Ugh that made me think of my sisters second wedding (she was really young at her first wedding). Anyways...at her 2<span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_7">nd</span> wedding I was 18 and the maid of honour. Then the time came for speeches (my other sister and I said our speeches together because we don't like talking in front of lots people), I said mine first. Now I can be pretty mushy and during a few points in my speech my voice cracked. But I held it together....until then end o f my speech where I looked at my sister (the bride) and broke down, like full out sobbing but I was half crying half laughing and basically it looked like I was struggling for air. My other sister found this comical and she decided to announce to the rest of the guests that she doesn't cry like me (at which time everyone <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_8">laughed</span>). <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_9">lol</span> now any time we watch the wedding video I have to leave the room when <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_10">Im</span> talking either because I'll get all emotional again or I'll be <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_11">embarrassed</span>.<br /><br />So I've come to the conclusion that I <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_12">don't</span> particularly like seeing myself on video and am extra critical of myself. Oh well I'm not famous (...yet) so I <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_13">don't</span> need to worry about these kind of things! Just wait world one day I'll be <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_14">topping</span> the charts with my phenomenal voice! <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_15">hah</span>!Girl Making it Throughhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11199818933631448895noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1677002031669879250.post-799135905701536812008-10-16T17:14:00.002-04:002008-10-16T19:15:08.167-04:00A picture is worth a thousand words!!! :)I just printed off a whole bunch of pictures from the last few months and have updated my room with lots of them. I love photos and I have them all over my room. Some people believe that your bedroom should be a place of peace and serenity so there shouldn't be photos of people. But I clearly don't agree with this. I love looking at photos of some the best times I've had with my friends. They will always cheer me up even if it's only for a little while.<br /><br />I love being surrounded with these photos because even if the people in them aren't near me I can see them whenever I choose and that makes me happy :) So I now have an obscene amount of photos in my room but that's how I roll!!<br /><p>So keep those that you love close always! <3<br /></p>Girl Making it Throughhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11199818933631448895noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1677002031669879250.post-35092592009374576812008-10-15T21:57:00.003-04:002008-10-15T22:23:04.048-04:00A Person Is ALWAYS a Person FIRST!<span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">Sooo</span> I really don't like it when people judge others about things they can't changed. FOR example : "There's a down <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">syndrome</span> person", it should be said instead like "There's a person with down syndrome". (not that I'm condoning pointing this out it's just an example).<br /><br />Basically my point is that we are all<em> PEOPLE</em> no matter if we are tall, short, big, little, white, <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2">asian</span>,black, smart, slow, popular, loner <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_3">ish</span>, funny, dull, young, old, etc! We all have something in common and it's about time people realize that we are all going through life and we all deal with problems no matter how big or small. We need to stop criticizing and start loving and <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_4">accepting</span>.<br /><br />Bullying, teasing, and unnecessary things really shouldn't happen. Especially when you are old enough to know better. But even in university where I am surrounding by many young adults who are supposed to have reached a certain level of maturity tend to judge others. Just today I heard someone say "maybe she should cut back on the donuts". This was not directed at me but another girl who was a little heavy set. Now I don't think it's fair to make judgements when you <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_5">don't</span> know all the facts.<br /><br />To be fair I know it's hard to not notice people but if you are going to judge them at all judge them in a positive light, like thinking or saying how much you love their hair/clothes/style etc. Compliments will get you a lot further than derogatory comments.<br /><br />Well <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_6">that's</span> all I've got to say bout that <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_7">ttyl</span>! :)Girl Making it Throughhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11199818933631448895noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1677002031669879250.post-43805326367367876942008-10-13T15:38:00.002-04:002008-10-13T15:55:26.579-04:00Communication....REQUIRED!!No relationship will survive without the vital necessity that is communication! This includes boyfriends/girlfriends, friends, family members, ANYONE. It's really starting to bug me. This also ties into the whole fake thing. If you want a relationship to last you MUST put effort into it. I love it when I know someone is putting effort into staying close to me, it makes me feel wanted :)<br /><br />Just knowing the little things that's going on in someone <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">else's</span> life is knowledge that you're privy to, be thankful for it. But <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">that's</span> not to say that if you don't talk to a friend who's away means you're no longer friends. You are friends as long as they stay in your heart and mind! (All my friends are there always <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2">xo</span>)<br /><br />Communication is what keeps a close connection between you and the ones you love. And although I'm shy I do know how to talk. I like to love and be loved. It makes all the hard times worth it.<br /><br />I am who I am, accept it or not, <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_3">I'm</span> not changing. I've lost touch with many people in my life and whether or not they are by my side today, they have helped make me who I am. I hold no grudges and love each and every person who has ever been in my life no matter how long they were around for. They made me who I am.<br /><br />If you want me to stay in your life, for a day, a year, or a lifetime I am going to need some communication.<br /><br />So remember to talk, communicate and always love! Life's too short for regrets! :) <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_4">xo</span>Girl Making it Throughhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11199818933631448895noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1677002031669879250.post-13060851906327901142008-10-12T12:06:00.002-04:002008-10-12T12:10:20.742-04:00Thanksgiving Weekend!Happy Thanksgiving weekend to all the Canadians out there! This year is a bit different for me for thanksgiving. For the past 18 years I have gone to my grandmas house for thanksgiving and all my cousins, and aunts and uncles would be there. But this year we aren't going. I was pretty upset needless to say.<br /><br />Since my immediate family has grown and there are 4 little kids we wont be going down to see the rest of the <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">fam</span> this year. Thanksgiving always used to be my favorite holiday because I love spending time with the family, especially the people in my family I don't get to see very often. But the times they are a changing so I guess I should be open to new traditions.<br /><br />Well that's all I've got for now, sorry for the shortness! But I must put some stuff together so I can head out to my sisters for the beginning of a new tradition! <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">xo</span>Girl Making it Throughhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11199818933631448895noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1677002031669879250.post-55117879496965405072008-10-11T00:08:00.002-04:002008-10-11T00:16:58.524-04:00Be who YOU are and be that Perfectly!!It's hard to figure out who you are, what your purpose is, what you want to get out of life, and where you're going. But doing things that others do because THEY are doing them, doesn't mean it's right for you. I understand that you are confused and you think that well if that works for them I'm going to do it.<br /><br /><span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">I'm</span> not a controlling person, at all. But people need to realize that copying others is not the way for them to find happiness. Sure, a monetary happiness may be gained, but nothing long term. You have to do what's right to you. Not what's popular, cool, or something that you think others will be interested in. You don't do things so you can say you do them. You do it for yourself. At least you should.<br /><br />Finding oneself is a hard task but you have to look within in yourself and love you for you. So if you are a jock/nerd/average/studious/tall/short/thick/thin/<span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">blonde</span>/brunette/red-head/<span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2">Caucasian</span>/<span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_3">African</span>/<span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_4">Asian</span>/<span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_5">Greek</span>/<span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_6">Italian</span>/<span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_7">Spanish</span> WHATEVER you are, don't try to be ANYTHING else BUT that.<br /><br />STOP CARING ABOUT WHAT PEOPLE THINK OF YOU!!!<br /><br />Now <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_8">I'm</span> not encouraging reckless and/or dangerous behavior, just don't try to impress someone by doing something you think they may like, it's not worth it.<br /><br />OKAY I'm done. Peace out! <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_9">xo</span>Girl Making it Throughhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11199818933631448895noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1677002031669879250.post-34354783607027930242008-10-08T12:31:00.002-04:002008-10-08T12:43:39.113-04:00Back When It Was SimpleLately I've found myself wishing that I could be a kid again. No bills, little <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">responsibility</span>, no job, no worries. It was all good. And now I know that I should have listened to those adults who told me enjoy your childhood it goes by too fast, I now know exactly what they meant.<br /><br />When we were kids our parents would protect us from the harsh realities of the world. They took care of us and showed us how to make good choices. People were almost always pleasant to you and everyone was your friend. You could wear <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">whatever</span> you wanted to and not be judged. You could play for hours and hours with barely any toys by using your imagination.<br /><br />But those days are gone, lost, and missed dearly.<br /><br />As a child I didn't realize how good I had it, until I hit 13 and reality hit me hard. My dad had an a affair and my <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2">family</span> was falling apart. The world showed me its dark side.<br /><br />From that fateful day (November 4, 2002) onwards my life has been no stranger to misery. I have dealt with a lot of difficult things. But they have only made me stronger, and given me the ability to appreciate the small joys in life.<br /><br />My life is FAR from normal, or perfect. But it is still my life an I refuse to let it go. Things could be worse, and I have to be thankful for what I do have. I do miss those good <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_3">ol</span>' childhood days, but <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_4">there's</span> no point looking back, I have to keep my head up and look ahead to my future.Girl Making it Throughhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11199818933631448895noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1677002031669879250.post-12715134726892836712008-10-06T23:19:00.003-04:002008-10-06T23:30:41.329-04:00Carrie Underwood = YAYSo I just got home from the Carrie Underwood concert and it was awesome! She is such a talented artist and is beautiful, especially because she's real and down to earth. Which got me to thinking....<br /><br />I really don't like fake people. I've already touched on this a few times in previous posts but trying to be someone you are not is pointless. If you are big boned (like myself) then you are just going to have to accept that you are never going to be a size 2, but WHO CARES!? Be happy with who you are. Looks fade with time but a personality lasts forever. When someone is beautiful on the inside they <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">emanate</span> beauty outwards which in turn attracts people to them.<br /><br />I used to not like that saying "beautiful on the inside", because I thought it implied that you were ugly on the outside. But it doesn't imply that at all. Beauty is such a tough word to describe because there is no ONE characteristic that beauty describes. I like to believe everyone has beauty somewhere within in them. Yet no two people are beautiful in the same way.<br /><br />In <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">today's</span> culture too much focus is placed on <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2">appearances</span> and that puts too much pressure on EVERYONE! I just want to be comfortable with who I am and spend less time caring about how I look or how others see me, because even in just a couple short years the fashion mistakes I made will have been forgotten but the person I was will be something to remember.Girl Making it Throughhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11199818933631448895noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1677002031669879250.post-10666550979439307952008-10-05T21:04:00.003-04:002008-10-05T21:20:06.863-04:00Who Needs Materialistic Crap!?I have a sister who is rather materialistic. She seems to be more concerned with how her house looks/how she looks/how her kids look than how much quality time she spends with the kids. I personally think that her priorities are seriously out of order.<br /><br />Sure, materialistic <em>things</em> are nice to have. But to they <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">fulfill</span> your life? Give you incentive to work hard? Maybe for some people. Not me. If you don't make commitments to people, and work hard to make those relationships good and strong life just is not complete. Relationships are WAY more important than a house full of things. I think you can tell a persons worth by the people they surround themselves with. When I meet someone and they are sincere and kind those attributes are so much more appealing than a large bank account and a whole bunch of trinkets.<br /><br />I've grown up modestly, my family never had a lot of money, we got by but we were my no means rich. We got the necessities and that's all we needed. Fancy toys and clothes don't make you a better person.<br /><br />Last year for <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">Christmas</span> my sister bought a ridiculous amount of toys for her children. Some of those toys are still in packages. Now to me this is just wasteful. It would be better to say buy each child a toy they really want or something that has some educational value to it and then clothes and such. Then buy a large family gift, like a game that can be enjoyed by the whole family and allows for family time. Spending time with your family is an invaluable gift, one I wish wouldn't be as squandered as it has been lately, especially for me.<br /><br />Lately my one sister seems to think that if we aren't spending every spare second by her side we're going against. Yet every time she calls we are there by her side, only to be yelled and screamed at for no apparent reason. Take for example today: it was my nephew's 2<span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2">nd</span> birthday party and my mom and I went over to my sisters house to help prepare dinner. I also agreed to go help her pick up pumpkins with her for the front of the house (because god forbid you don't have pumpkins right this second!?). Anyways it somehow ended up with my sister yelling at us for spending time with the kids instead of helping her. Whatever we left there was anger, blah!<br /><br /><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_3">Soooo</span> I have gone on quite the rant. But the moral of this post is that I could care less about materialistic things. I would rather be the poorest person with a close family and close friends whom I love and care about and see as much as possible than the richest person in the world who had a huge house with everything my heart could desire in it. Life is too short for nonsense, if you keep planning and continue focusing on <em>THINGS</em> life will pass you by, make time for friends, family and loved ones. Worry about the rest of it later.Girl Making it Throughhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11199818933631448895noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1677002031669879250.post-90614513371086534912008-10-02T17:06:00.002-04:002008-10-02T17:18:26.944-04:00They Say What You Want to HearDo friends tell you things you want to hear, or are they being honest. When our own view of ourselves is skewed we tend to not want to believe what our friends are saying because they have to say that to you.<br /><br />I have never been one with high self-esteem, and when friends and/or family tell me I am amazing/beautiful/talented etc I refuse to believe them, simply thinking they are saying it to me because they have to. I felt for the longest time that to be considered beautiful I had to have a guy tell me so. Well this is NOT the case. If you cannot accept that you are a wonderful person than no matter who tells you otherwise you won't believe them.<br /><br />Life is not over if you don't have a boyfriend. Sure, they're nice to have and it's another person to love you, but when you are young it is <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">definitely</span> not what one should stress over. I understand that if you are single and your friends aren't you are automatically going to assume there is something wrong with you, but this is not the case. No one wants to settle on any old guy just to say they have a boyfriend. You want to find someone who's : caring, considerate, kind, fun, intelligent enough to carry on meaningful conversations, and someone who makes you feel good about yourself. I know that's a lot of criteria but to be truly happy one cannot settle.<br /><br />So if you are single think of it this way : you are young and you have the rest of your life ahead of you, most of which time you will spend being married and 90% of young people plan on getting married. So take this time to enjoy your friends, go out to parties and essentially just have FUN. Because when you get a bit older and married things will be different. You want to get your partying out of your system now.<br /><br />Being single is not all that bad, and being critical of yourself due to the fact you are single just isn't fair. When your friends tell you are beautiful, amazing, talented etc, BELIEVE THEM!!! They love you and don't like seeing you upset.<br /><br />Now people may choose to not believe me on the basis as I do have a boyfriend. But I do understand how you feel. I have been there and have been depressed over the same things. And <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">I'm</span> offering my advice so that less people have to go through it. A guy that's right for you will come along when you least expect it.<br /><br />Now start celebrating who you are and love yourself because that is what needs to be addressed first and <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2">foremost</span>!!<br /><br />Sending out my love to everyone! <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_3">xo</span>Girl Making it Throughhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11199818933631448895noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1677002031669879250.post-249672985991542462008-10-02T12:45:00.003-04:002008-10-02T12:54:50.201-04:00New Duvet AdventureSo yesterday I made a trek to the mall to purchase a new duvet. Now I wanted a really nice, thick, and squishy one so I looked for the biggest bag. It also cannot be a down duvet as I am allergic to feathers, which is upsetting because usually the down ones are the nicest.<br /><br />Anyways, I found one and it was magnificently thick and I loved it. AND it was on 50% off (perfect no?). So I get up to the cash and she charges me full price, at which I argue and say there was a large sign and there were several just like it on sale. She proceeds to call the department and they tell her its not on sale. I then whip out the ad in the <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">flyer</span> (I'm pretty cool I know) and sure enough it is on sale. (Ugh I really don't enjoy these kinds of <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">shenanigans</span>). She <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2">apologizes</span> and offers me a card thing that if I sign up for I get an extra 10% off, <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_3">OK</span> so I do that.<br /><br />I get home and am thrilled as I open the bag and I pull it out only to see it's way too small, I look at the tag and sure enough it says Queen. And THEN I look at the bag, it was a Gel Fibre Bed (<span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_4">WTF</span>?) so I was clearly not impressed.<br /><br />So after all the turmoil I faced in the store I must now return my <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_5">purchase</span> and continue my search for a perfect duvet. Oh the trials and tribulations of my life :SGirl Making it Throughhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11199818933631448895noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1677002031669879250.post-37042424225383880092008-10-01T12:25:00.004-04:002008-10-01T12:51:26.902-04:00Sleep, a Dream? And FRIENDS!<span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">Sooo</span> today I had a fantastic sleep in! It was pretty exciting, and apparently note worthy enough to talk about here!<br /><br />While sleeping I had a rather strange dream. I <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2">don't</span> remember all the details but it essentially was me counting all the voting ballets for the presidential elections, and Barack <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_3">Obama</span> won! Now this is weird 1. Because I am <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_4">Canadian</span> and 2. <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_5">I'm</span> really uninvolved in anything political. So ya strange dream.<br /><br />But I do love dreaming! Its a fun escape from reality.<br /><br />ALSO when I woke up I happened to notice some pictures on my wall of my friends that are away at school. And I realized how much I miss them! Its tough being away from close friends because you think that they are experiencing all these things without you and in turn you are drifting as friends. But that can't be true because I know I miss them all the time and still love them just as much as if they were here. I just have to remember that just because there are some miles between us does not been it's putting distant between us. Miss u and love u guys!! M.H, S.T, S.P, N.S <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_6">xoxoxoxoox</span><br /><br />My life would not be complete with out my friends. They make me who I am and are always there to support me! <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_7">Awww</span> <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_8">I'm</span> in a very nostalgic mood! <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_9">lol</span>!<br /><br /><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_10">Soooo</span> <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_11">bloggers</span> make sure those whom you love know it!!! :DGirl Making it Throughhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11199818933631448895noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1677002031669879250.post-14321701312913633572008-09-30T00:17:00.003-04:002008-09-30T08:23:32.850-04:00Snooze button...againI really dont enjoy waking up to my alarm, yet I know it is a necessity because I wouldnt wake up early without it. But its soo sudden and not a very peaceful way to wake up. For a while I tried waking up to music from my ipod but then I would just lie there and listen to my sweet beats so it defeated the purpose as an alarm. I ALWAYS press the snooze button, and lay there for at least 5 more mintues. I am far from what one would call a morning person. I much rather wake up on my own whenever that may be and be happy about it. Oh well you got to do what you got to do.<br /><br /><br /><br />I am especially not enjoying that its getting to that time of year when it's dark outside when you wake up early. Nothing about that is fun. Oh well right now its my favourite season. I love pretty much everything about fall so hopefully I can put my self in a good mood by stepping on some extra crunchy leaves today.<br /><br /><br /><br />On another positive note it was raining as I fell asleep last night and I love falling asleep to the pitter patter of rain on the house! :) lol<br /><br /><br /><br />Im feeling in a comfort kind of mood, so Ill be wearing my yoga pants and sweartshirt today. Afterall today is my hell day. I am on campus for 12 hours. And 9.5 of those hours are spent in lecture. UGH. Jealous much?? Ya didn't think so, I wouldnt be either.Girl Making it Throughhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11199818933631448895noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1677002031669879250.post-56170264497874323422008-09-29T17:04:00.002-04:002008-09-29T17:11:27.047-04:00Quotes That MatterSo I was in the kitchen grabbing a glass of water and happen to notice two newspaper cut-outs on the fridge. They are each quotes that were printed in the paper as power thoughts for the day. Here they are:<br /><br />"When you feel incapable or unable to fulfill the task believe in yourself and discover the power that is available to those who will search with all their might."<br /><br />AND<br /><br />"Worry never solved a problem, healed a broken relationship or brought a positive result. Worry is a waste of energy. Begin to speak words of confidence and assurance to bring life to a dreary situation."<br /><br />I think both of these are <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">phenomenal</span>! They make you think about how to bring yourself out of the dumps and focus on the good opposed to the bad. Just little reminders we all need to think of ourselves as special, valued, and loved!<br /><br />Thanks goes to my Mom for cutting out these nice little quotes! :)Girl Making it Throughhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11199818933631448895noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1677002031669879250.post-71054783700842665452008-09-29T13:54:00.004-04:002008-09-29T15:10:40.821-04:00Science Fiction = Not 4 Me!!So I am taking this speculative fiction course that focuses on science fiction (when I enrolled in it I was not aware of its focus). Anyways I have to take it as it's one of the required courses since I am minoring in <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">English</span>.<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />Anyways I am reading this book <em>We</em> by <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">Yevgeny</span> <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2">Zamyatin</span>. And apparently it is "the most influential science fiction novel of the 20<span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_3">th</span> century".<br /><p><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5251504431791713442" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; CURSOR: hand; TEXT-ALIGN: center" height="256" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhWDD3ATb43EmidrT2uj_OY9f7hktQbOiS3gDaB6G60RtT4rzdKI_LVt7063TAVwVhpoOFeCoixfqW4OOF6BYeWpFOxZWVqsBXkVP-nSD1TjDESwZfsv1FpnTpCYcSzoVHhvuYIQgC8aws/s320/we.jpg" width="153" border="0" /><br />Well I care to disagree. The book's setting is way in our <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_4">future</span> and everyone lives in this walled in world of glass. Everyone wears a uniform and they are identified by letters and <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_5">numerics</span> (<span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_6">ie</span>. I-330, D-503). They follow the "Table of Hours" where every hour of every day has a prescribed meaning. Their ideal (according to their "One State") is when <em>nothing happens</em> anymore. AKA every action must be <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_7">pre</span>-conceived and planned. Now to me this seems <em>way</em> too out there and I just cannot understand how this can be influential when it is suggesting that it is better to be without a soul and without an imagination. Life without imagination, choice, and soul seems dull and boring. But maybe I am <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_8">mis</span>-interpreting it all together but from now on I'm going to stick to the classics!</p><p>But don't go by me! Give it a read yourself, because <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_9">don't</span> get me wrong it is interesting!</p>Girl Making it Throughhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11199818933631448895noreply@blogger.com0